How To Commit To A New Relationship With Yourself Series

How To Commit To A New Relationship With Yourself Series

About making new choices in order to become your number one provider and supporter.

“How To Commit To A New Relationship With Yourself Series” and each new post in the future will share with you a new way to discover yourself, find confidence within, and help you learn how to provide for and support yourself rather than failing to recieve it from outside sources. I am excited to share my favorite methods that have helped me, let’s get started! 

 

It Is In Your Best Interest To Recreate A Relationship With Yourself 

When you are not supplying your own love and acceptance, you are too easily vulnerable to getting hurt and making impulsive decisions. In order to supply yourself love and acceptance, you need to commit to a new relationship with yourself to gather information. Use this information not to judge or criticize yourself, but instead to improve where you want improvement. 

Start working on how you treat yourself, value yourself, and take care of yourself. Gain love and acceptance within yourself, so that you can stop the disappointment coming from other sources. Become sure of your core values, beliefs, and actions so that when others shake you-you are deeply rooted in the ground.

Why are you seeking anything outside of yourself? Everything you need is within.

Why You Probably Seek Love And Acceptance

Most seek love and acceptance and don’t even know it.

If you’re seeking love and acceptance you may try and receive it from your parents, partner, children or maybe even your pets instead of yourself. Some even try to receive acceptance among strangers. When you don’t receive what you need from them, you may seek out other alternatives to satisfy this underlying need. Instead, you may reach for food, sex, drugs, gambling or any other addiction which is not going to give you love and acceptance either.

Recognize Your Temporary Relief And Let Go

Everyone in the world is addicted to something. Whether that is love, wealth, status, approval, a great appearance, acceptance, food, sugar, drugs, addiction, sex, etc. All of those things have one thing in common, every example listed is a temporary relief. You are always in need of a constant dose of it over and over. It will never feel enough until you are supplying your own need.

Each is a mask to which you truly seek which usually stems down to a need for love and acceptance. This is the need that you will learn to supply for yourself. It is different than your basic daily needs which will be discussed in the next post of this series.

It’s Time To Stop Fearing And Start Healing

We all fear something because we are human. But, It is time to cut off your outside sources that will never be enough and start taking care of yourself. Outside love and acceptance: you don’t need it because you will soon find everything you need within yourself from every area of your life. Addiction: What is scarier than facing an addiction? Well many things, but its a pretty big thing to fear. Not only is it fearful to face addiction, but it may also be even more fearful facing the underlying cause of your addiction. If you wish to end your fear and start healing, you must first cut off the old source. Decide how you wish to do it. 

Let’s stop for a moment and talk a little about anxiety. While facing your fear you probably will encounter your body trying to protect you from your fear. This is called anxiety.

What makes it even worse is that if you are fearful enough, your body may even create physical symptoms and you will have no idea that it is due to anxiety. 

If you have anxiety, understand that anxiety is a fear of the unknown. The unknown can repetitively make you question everything scaring you into either freezing or making choices that are not going to benefit you. You will even question your own intentions, behaviors, and beliefs.

You may decide to take medication, which is fine, or you may want to relieve your anxiety organically. A personal choice that only you get to decide. 

To make your anxiety “feel” more manageable, start getting to know yourself so you can be sure of yourself.

Try meditation, breathing techniques, tapping, exercise, affirmations, mantras, and listening to calming sound to relax you. You may even speak to a professional to help you get through your anxiety, but most of all follow the suggestions throughout this post and take good care of yourself from all aspects.

The more grounded you become the less you are likely to encounter anxiety. 

I did not say it was going to be easy nor did I say I could relate to any particular experience nor am I judging you so stop judging yourself. We each have a unique story, and you deserve to be healthy enough to overcome it and tell us about it. You’ve got this!

 

Start Healing By Discovering Yourself 

I suggest you go on a self-seeking journey and discover yourself. As I mentioned before, seek out information about yourself and use the information not to criticize or judge yourself, but to make the changes you wish to see in your life. 

Be the change you wish to see in the world. – Ghandi

All About Me Journal:

Find the coolest journal you’ve ever seen and use that journal for an All About Me journal. Write down the things you like and dislike. Your characteristics and the things that “irk” you. Then ask yourself, what from the examples above do I feel drawn to the most that I crave based on my actions? Watch these cravings slowly change as you change. 

When things bother you, ask yourself why? I do not recommend you deeply question and criticize your thoughts and actions because it will cost you self-judgment and distress. Also, do not ponder deeply on your mistakes. Focus on the present and future, not the past. I want you to get comfortable with the idea that mistakes are okay, and that when you hear your mistakes, instead of finding shame, you make it a habit to find a solution. A solution with possible outcomes that you are okay with. Once you find your answer use it as information (a tool), and make a better decision for the next time you find yourself in a similar situation.

Write it down, what bothers you and why, and then the solution you come up with. By turning shame into a solution, we are confronting our reality and creating a life we are happy to live.  

Do You Need Help Discovering Yourself?

I didn’t know it at first that love and acceptance were what I truly sought, but after listening to a podcast it really helped me put things into perspective. 

The podcast I suggest is about the five elements (eastern medicine), recommended by a very wise therapist. I learned a lot about my characteristics and actions and how to improve. It was extremely valuable and it helped me in many ways. Check it out for yourself, if you’d like.

It’s called: Inspired Action Podcast

Start with episodes 12-18. You can listen to the rest later (Optionally). It simply shares with you each element, so listen to them all. Then you decide which element you relate to most. Decide which of those three elements belong in your first, second or third (You will learn these terms later). Then you simply learn how you can improve where you want improvement. Believe or disbelieve, the choice is yours. 

Astrology

Astrology, not the horoscope kind because I just don’t understand it, is a lot of fun to read. There are many fantastic books that teach you about the signs you were born under based on the exact date and location of your birth. These books have freaky coincidences where yourself, friends and family strangely can relate to their particular sun sign and other signs. It has also helped me to gather information about myself and it may help you as well. If you do not like astrology or you are not open to it, that is also information for your All About Me book. You are perfect just the way you are, believe or disbelieve, the choice is yours. 

 

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